SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- The U.S. Postal Service (USPS) revealed Friday that Steve Jobs, the technology guru and cultural icon behind the cultish electronic lifestyle company that is Apple Inc., had approved a commemorative postage stamp slated for a 2015 release. Stamp designs are typically private affairs that are kept under wraps from the public until their printing. It seems ironic that the struggling postal service would honor one of the pioneers of electronic mail, but representatives for the USPS admitted that the conditions Jobs placed on his authorization for the stamp created an unprecedented profit opportunity for the agency.

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- If you live in Bennington Vale and fall into that odd one percent of the city's unwed yet heterosexual population, then February 14 can present an understandably bleak outlook. St. Valentine would probably agree. According to legend, Valentine refused to deny Christ at the exhortations of Emperor Claudius in the year 280. For this, he had his head lopped off. But not before he restored hearing and sight to the jailer's daughter. Hell of a guy. Has that "Green Mile" feel to it. It's an inspiring story; deeds most worthy of canonization. But that's not why so many people will be reading "The Bell Jar" by candlelight alone this evening. No, Esther Howland is why.

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Actor Shia LaBeouf, donning a bag over his head in public, continues to decry what fleeting celebrity he once had and insists that he is no longer famous. Yet, LaBeouf has embarked on a very public apology tour, which has culminated in a Los Angeles art installation titled “#IAmSorry.” In the exhibition, the no-longer-famous actor sits at a table, bagged visage and all, with implements that include whiskey, pliers, candy, a ukulele, film artifacts such as a “Transformers” toy and a bullwhip (á la Indiana Jones)*, and a copy of Daniel Clowes’ book “The Death Ray.” The latter is the most revealing because LaBeouf recently confessed, although with a feigned sense of ignorance, that he utterly plagiarized another of Clowes’ stories. Now, LaBeouf is again being attacked as a flagrant plagiarist for a new project he claims to have authored, which depicts the story of an ancient Hebrew rabbi who claims a divine birthright, is persecuted as a result, dies during a crucifixion and returns to Earth in the spiritual form of a messiah.

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Last week, in what Republicans labeled a socialist plot, CVS Caremark announced plans to stop selling tobacco products, including cigarettes, in its stores beginning October 1. This move makes CVS the first national pharmacy to pull tobacco products from its shelves. Executives for the drug chain said selling cigarettes runs contrary to the company’s core mission to promote the health of its customers. "Put simply, the sale of tobacco products is inconsistent with our purpose," said CVS Caremark CEO Larry Merlo. But influential members of the GOP now question the legality of a commercial enterprise deciding what it will or won't vend. On Monday, the head economist of a local Republican think tank said he was in the process of filing a formal complaint against CVS with the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC).

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- The business news during the first quarter of 2014 has already been filled with executives moving to competing firms, mergers, acquisitions and notable divestitures, such as Google selling off Motorola. Following suit, the world’s premier terrorist organization, al Qaeda, announced that it would be severing ties with its best-known affiliate, the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria, which is fighting a ferocious guerrilla war in both of those nations. Al Qaeda, the corporate parent, issued a blunt statement on Monday announcing the divestiture of the Islamic State from all Middle Eastern terror operations. Representatives for al Qaeda’s Pakistan-based headquarters called the move a strategic and necessary business decision similar to Google’s sale of Motorola. "Difficult as it is to sever a business partnership, we believe this move will free our engineers and operations specialists to focus on our core model, which has been suffering since 2011," said a senior al Qaeda press official.