Monday, October 28, 2013

Activist Male Judge Overturns Female Approved Texas Abortion Law, Dealing Blow to Women's Rights

"Glaring proof that American men are allowed to make decisions regarding a woman's body and her choices."

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- "Power mad" was one of the pejorative phrases used by female voters in Texas to describe District Judge Lee Yeakel's ruling to strike down limits on abortion after state lawmakers passed them during a legislative session this summer. Yeakel declared two key provisions to the health and safety code unconstitutional for restricting women's access to pregnancy termination clinics and undermining doctors' rights to treat patients according to their best medical interests. Janis Lane, the outspoken leader of the Central Mississippi Tea Party, attacked the ruling for considering only a patient's medical interests, not her moral interests. State Representative Jodie Laubenberg and Senator Donna Campbell -- two female lawmakers in Texas who helped drive the pro-life bill that passed by 62 percent, including a majority of Texas women -- called Yeakel's decision a "huge setback for women's rights" and "glaring proof that American men are allowed to make decisions regarding a woman's body and her choices."

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Obamacare Website Glitch Caused by Death Panel Option

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- The development team responsible for the Obamacare website,, faced tough questions from a House oversight committee Thursday over the problematic online enrollment portal. Republicans and Democrats alike expressed frustration with the slipshod deployment of the site, which remains inaccessible to countless users. Since its October 1 debut, the online health care marketplace has been plagued by problems. Exasperated lawmakers grilled Cheryl Campbell, senior vice president at CGI Federal, the primary contractor, for over three hours without determining an expeditious fix for the issues. "If there was a silver bullet to answer that question, I'd give it to you," Campbell replied. According to Rep. Ted Cruz (R-Texas), Obamacare's silver bullet is precisely the cause. The unexpected volume of Americans seeking to end their suffering through the Death Panel option, the underlying purpose for the Affordable Care Act, is crashing the site.

Friday, October 18, 2013

Republican Defeat Over Government Shutdown Frees Democrats to Pursue Obamacare Death Panels

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Just after midnight on Thursday morning, President Obama signed a bill to reopen the federal government and raise the debt limit after the Senate reached an eleventh-hour agreement Wednesday, following a nearly three-week shutdown. If the goal of the maneuver, as many Republicans stated, was to benefit taxpayers by curbing spending and bolstering economic growth, the House seemed to have missed the mark. The loss of government services could siphon $3.1 billion from the gross domestic product, according to economists. In reality, tax reforms and spending cuts were merely the public-facing facades for a deeper ideological battle over repealing Obamacare and environmental regulations. "We fought the good fight. We just didn't win," Speaker Boehner told reporters, beaten down and frazzled by his party's failed attempt to hold the president's health care reform to ransom. Now, seizing momentum with a major mid-term victory, Democrats are eager to deploy their insidious Death Panel initiative with "renewed vigor and aggression."

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

House Abandons Effort to Reopen Government, Says Permanent Shutdown Will Save Economy

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- As the government shutdown lumbers into its 16th day, pushing the United States precariously close to defaulting on its bonds, House Republicans abruptly scrapped plans Tuesday evening to vote on a revised budget and raise the debt ceiling before Thursday's deadline. The Senate had already been close to finalizing a proposal that would have prevented the default while keeping the government functioning until 2014. The House, however, announced that it was drafting its own resolution. Speaker John Boehner's failure to submit the conservative-friendly alternative is seen as a severe blow to his standing and authority. But shortly after House leaders officially called off their efforts, Boehner surprised reporters by admitting that ranking conservatives had no desire to reopen the government. Ever. "After considering everything in detail, we believe that leaving cumbersome elements of the federal government closed indefinitely will actually save our economy by doing away with unnecessary, financially prohibitive regulations."

Monday, October 14, 2013

Political Protests by Liberals and Tea Party Threaten Columbus Day Celebration

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Today, many U.S. citizens observe the arrival of Christopher Columbus to American shores, a voyage that concluded on October 12, 1492. The holiday has been celebrated unofficially since the late 18th century, and officially in various areas since the early 20th century. In San Narciso County, the annual Columbus Day reenactment ceremonies have bolstered the local economy with an influx of Southern Californians who gather at Kinneret's Battersea Field to enjoy a variety of beverages, delicacies and the Integration of the Indigenous Peoples commemoration. This year, however, Mayor Manny DiPresso has increased security after receiving word that a group of demonstrators plans to protest the ceremony.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

K9 Unit Attacks Increase Among Latinos and Blacks, Police Tell Critics Dogs Aren't Racist

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- The most recent semiannual report released by the Police Assessment Resource Center showed a steady increase in the number of minorities bitten by canine units with the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department over the last few years. Although the report cited a lack of adequate supervision from canine handlers, critics and civil rights advocates have accused the department of racially profiling minorities, evident in the prevalence of attacks against non-Caucasians. San Narciso County Police Department spokesperson Ren Williams scoffed at the allegations of racism. "There is no proof whatsoever that dogs have a sense a race, or even comprehend discrimination based on race," he said. "It's a ridiculous and unreasoned attack against these animals."

Monday, October 7, 2013

Phone and Internet Providers Report Huge Spikes in Calls and Emails During NSA Furlough

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Despite reassuring rhetoric from both sides of the political aisle in Congress, which has grown from a fissure to a continental divide, the government shutdown now entering its second week has halted more than so-called nonessential services. Intelligence officials have expressed concerns about national security with 70 percent of NSA employees furloughed. "The damage will be insidious," Director of National Intelligence James Clapper warned the Senate Judiciary Committee. "Each day that goes by, the jeopardy increases." The situation, however, appears to have taken a turn for the ironic with telecommunications and Internet service providers reporting dramatic increases in subscribers making phone calls, sending emails and posting on social networks.

Friday, October 4, 2013

Alex Jones Reveals Tropical Storm Karen as False Flag Operation by Obama Administration

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Government watchdog Alex Jones has been an instrumental force in journalism, exposing President Obama's conspiracies to uninformed Americans and forcing Congress to take remedial action against agencies that are caught red-handed trying to perpetrate false flag attacks. As news spread Thursday of a firefight near the U.S. Capitol building, Jones immediately recognized the shootout as a feeble tactic by a desperate White House: "They're pulling a big distraction on us," he said, alluding to the event as a staged diversion to shift attention from the federal government shutdown over Obamacare. He also warned the public to "look for them to stage a bunch of stuff… Everything the globalists do is falling apart right now." On Friday, with FEMA personnel furloughed and tropical storm Karen raging toward the southern coast of Louisiana, Jones accused the Obama administration of engineering the hurricane to condemn brave Republicans for their refusal to accept a socialist health care policy, even though it led to the shutdown.

Thursday, October 3, 2013

House Republicans Brave Shutdown, Assure Worried Supporters: "We'll Manage to Put Food on Our Tables"

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- The shutdown of the federal government by House Republicans will enter its fourth day on Friday. Congress has yet to resolve the fiscal impasse with Democrats, despite a flurry of legislative activity this week. The frustrating inaction, which has led to furloughs and hundreds of thousands of government workers bereft of pay, was further complicated Thursday when a woman attempted to breach security by driving through blockades surrounding Capitol Hill. President Obama singled out House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio) as the primary impediment to progress, accusing the GOP of treating the American people as "pawns in some political game." House Republicans retorted that they too are among the countless Americans now out of work, and bravely reminded their constituents not to worry: "It's tough being unemployed, but like you, we'll find a way to keep the lights on and put food on the family table until this job situation turns around."

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