PARIS, France (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- In a strong statement -- as strong as the stench of cigarettes, dachshund droppings, diesel fuel, and musty sweat from a Paris cafe -- the famed French fashion house Chanel announced actor Brad Pitt as the new face of Chanel No. 5 perfume, one of the most famous fragrances in the world. It marks the first time Chanel has selected a man to represent its iconic perfume. Coco Chanel first introduced her No. 5 scent in 1922, although prominent male figures of the day claimed she had released her No. 1 and No. 2 scents to them frequently before that time. The fragrance was named for Coco's affinity with the number five -- most evidenced by the fact that in any given afternoon, Coco Chanel exposed herself to at least five venereal diseases. Although Pitt seems to share Coco Chanel's fondness for promiscuity, home wrecking and existential dread, company representatives explained that Pitt was chosen because of his horrible hygiene. One spokesperson said: "Irony begets irony in this case. It's ironic that a scruffy man was picked to promote a delicate fragrance made exclusively for women. It's more ironic that the French made this decision because of hygiene concerns."