BREAKING NEWS
Showing posts with label World News. Show all posts
Showing posts with label World News. Show all posts

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Trump Ditches Paris Accord, Sets Sights on Jurassic Park-Inspired Fossil Fuel Farms

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SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- In struggling to uphold his campaign pledges, many of which have stalled or faded away in a billow of brazen rhetoric, President Donald Trump announced Thursday that he will withdraw the United States from the Paris accord, a landmark 2015 global agreement to combat the devastating effects of climate change. Trump has generally viewed green energy initiatives as unfounded scams that contribute nothing to the economy, although employment figures, growth projections and financial data paint a different portrait. Instead, Trump seeks to bolster American production and create jobs by reviving the whaling industry and, in an odd remark from the White House Rose Garden, “putting scientists to work engineering a tremendous Jurassic Park full of dinosaurs we can breed and harvest into petroleum -- like an amazing fossil fuel farm.”

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Trump Wishes Israel a 'Rad Summer' in Guestbook Note at Holocaust Memorial


SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Touring the site of Yad Vesham, a national Holocaust memorial in Israel, is a customary stop for U.S. presidential visits. The mood is generally somber and contemplative, as reflected in the heartfelt messages left by previous heads-of-state in the guestbook. Following tradition, President Donald Trump also made an entry on the pages of this historic ledger, but in a style the Washington Post described as “strangely upbeat, self-referential and written in his signature all-caps.” Unlike his predecessor, who penned an emotional and elegant tribute, Trump seemed to have confused the record for a yearbook and wished Israel a “rad summer with bitchin waves.”

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Trump Meets Turkish President Erdogan, Hands Over Nuclear Codes While Boasting

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SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Following last week’s controversial meeting with Russian officials, in which President Trump divulged classified intelligence to foreign nationals who have been deemed hostile to U.S. interests, the White House welcomed Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan on Tuesday. Trump extended a warm greeting to Erdogan, an authoritarian ruler whose relationship with the United States has been strained and at times combative. The president praised his counterpart’s tough leadership style and boasted of a renewed alliance, remarking that he was eager to begin sharing sensitive state secrets with Turkey.

Monday, May 15, 2017

TASS Grants U.S. Press Access to Monitoring Devices Planted in Oval Office

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SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- The day after President Trump fired FBI Director James Comey in a startling and virtually unprecedented decision, he raised further suspicion by hosting a closed-door meeting with Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov and Ambassador Sergey Kislyak -- during an active investigation into his possible collusion with Moscow. More troubling, the White House blocked U.S. reporters from attending the conference but allowed members of TASS, Russia’s state-controlled news agency, to be present. Intelligence officials condemned the action as a major security breach, explaining that Russian crews could have brought in concealed electronic monitoring apparatus. But in a largess to the beleaguered U.S. press, TASS has agreed to give American journalists access to the live-streaming audio and video devices it planted in the Oval Office last week.

Thursday, May 11, 2017

Acting FBI Director McCabe Excited About First and Probably Only Week in Office

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SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Acting, and most likely interim, FBI Director Andrew McCabe rejected a series of assertions by the White House that his predecessor, James Comey, had compromised the bureau’s integrity, lost the faith of the public and frustrated peers with his insistence on squandering Justice Department resources for a costly crusade to validate Russia’s meddling in the election, which Trump described as a “minor concern” to employees. McCabe boldly contradicted Trump’s allegations and praised Comey. He then vowed that nothing could prevent the FBI from “doing the right thing” and pushing the probe forward. After his testimony on Capitol Hill, McCabe said, “I’m terribly excited to step into this role, and I’m looking forward to the one or maybe two weeks I’ll get to serve America as the director of the FBI.”

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Trump Met Russian Officials for Expert Advice on Replacing Comey as FBI Director

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SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- President Trump’s abrupt decision to fire FBI Director James Comey on Tuesday evening, as the probe into Russia’s interference with the election deepens, has raised the hackles of virtually every person outside the president’s circle of trust. Comey’s dramatic ouster as the nation’s chief law enforcement authority, who was deep in the middle of a sensitive investigation that could extend to Trump, casts further doubts on the president’s denials that no ties exist between his White House and the Kremlin. With Department of Justice and intelligence officials convinced that Russia meddled in U.S. affairs, Mr. Trump’s ill-timed, closed-door meeting with Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov on Wednesday only intensified the scrutiny. But following the private conversation in the Oval Office, White House press representatives allayed public fears and explained that Trump was consulting with Moscow to help select the next director of the FBI -- someone intimately familiar with Russia to better lead the investigation.

Thursday, April 27, 2017

Holocaust Remembrance: Trump's Stern Warning to Hitler, Who Died 72 Years Ago

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SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- During the annual Holocaust remembrance ceremony at the Capitol on Tuesday, President Trump attempted to send a forceful message to critics who have doubted his commitment to fighting discrimination and anti-Semitism. But Trump also indulged in his penchant for deviating from prepared remarks to interject rambling, incoherent and often bizarre anecdotes about deceased historical and public figures. While bestowing honors on Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., Trump veered off script and issued a puzzling call to recognize Frederick Douglass, implying that the famous abolitionist was still alive. He recently lavished similar present-tense accolades on Luciano Pavarotti, who died in 2007. But the confused commander-in-chief stunned Israel’s ambassador to the United States when he delivered a stern warning to Adolf Hitler, whose life ended 72 years ago.

Monday, April 17, 2017

Pence Warns North Korea of Trump’s Military Resolve: “He Won’t Hesitate to Kill Us All”

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SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- President Donald Trump frittered away Easter Sunday at the noticeably sparse Easter Egg Roll on the South Lawn of the White House. During the celebration, the 139th of its kind, Trump belittled the audience, bullied adoring children, complained that the predominantly pubescent attendees (girls over the age of 13) offered little in the way of “Easter eye candy,” and disappointed revelers who discovered only pillow mints from Trump hotels inside their plastic eggs. Meanwhile, Vice President Mike Pence traveled to the Korean Peninsula to warn Kim Jong-un against testing Trump’s willingness to launch preemptive strikes in response to threats. “I urge North Korea not to question the strength of the Armed Forces of the United States in this region, nor our president’s itchy trigger finger,” Pence said. “He’ll do it. He’ll press the button. He’ll kill us all.”
 
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