Monday, November 29, 2010

Walmart Pulls "Rock Band -- Def Leppard Edition" Over Missing Drum Stick

SAN NARCISO, Calif. -- Thousands of angry fans flooded the phone lines and email servers of MTV/Electronic Arts and its retailers with complaints over today’s release of the eagerly anticipated “Rock Band – Def Leppard Edition” game. The issue stems from a perceived design flaw in the drum kit.

“It’s been chaos in our Customer Service lines,” said Zeke Gersch, a Walmart manager in Bennington Vale. “We expected a lot of orders with Christmas coming up, but not this. All the games are screwed up. There’s only one drum stick in the box. Even worse, the drum kit itself has all these extra foot pedals that no one knows how to use. I can’t for the life of me figure out what the game-making people was thinking.”

Stephanie Welterhalt, a spokesperson for Electronic Arts, seemed as bewildered by the backlash as consumers were by the game’s construction.

“I mean, yes, the design was intentional,” she said. “We strive for realism with the Rock Band experience. Do I really have the explain this to so-called Def Leppard fans? I don’t want to sound thick, but it seems a little offensive.”

Walmart has pulled all the Def Leppard edition games from its shelves until the manufacturer resolves the issue.

Electronic Arts and MTV claim that “no issue exists that needs resolving. Except maybe a lesson in the band’s tragic history.”

So far, both parties remain adamant in their positions. Competing retailers Best Buy and Toys R Us, however, have committed to keeping the games in stock for their customers.

“We don’t understand the impasse,” said a purchasing manager for Best Buy, “but it’s great for our business. We’ve thrown our support fully behind Electronic Arts.”

In a brief phone interview, Welterhalt added, “What’s next with these rubes? I suppose they’ll pitch another fit when they find out they’ll actually have the play their own instruments in the upcoming ‘Rock Band – The Monkees’ release.”

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