Thursday, March 10, 2011

Charlie Sheen Sues Warner Bros. for $100 Million and Strange List of Concessions

HOLLYWOOD, Calif. -- Charlie Sheen, the embattled star of “Two and a Half Men,” has escalated his war of words against Warner Bros. to the courthouse, where he is suing the studio and the executive producer of the show for $100 million. Sheen’s attorney, Marty Singer, said the lawsuit seeks to recoup salary and wages owed to his client under contract. Warner Bros. terminated Sheen four days ago, citing health concerns and various “felony offenses,” which Singer said provided insufficient legal grounds for firing the actor.

In addition to the $100 million, Sheen is also pursuing punitive damages that include the placenta of a three-nippled California mountain beaver, a garden gnome with “Cambodian facial features,” a birthday party hosted by the cast of “Sons of Anarchy,” tickets to the Spider-Man Broadway show, a vial of ichor, and a time machine capable of sending him to Jenna Jameson’s bedroom circa 1996.

Discussing the legal action, Sheen posted on Twitter, “Fastball: Torpedo away... You corporate Trolls were warned. And now you’ve been served!”

Warner Brothers executives, also via Twitter, issued this response: “Use ur magic fingers and mental Vatican warlock powers to conjure the $$ urself. #Winning so much it hurts.”
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