BREAKING NEWS

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Marketing Blunder Over Wiz Khalifa’s “Rolling Papers” Causes Problems for Area Head Shops

SAN NARCISO, Calif. -- Wiz Khalifa’s much anticipated “Rolling Papers” hit shelves today, but because of a half-baked marketing campaign mix-up, head shops across California have been inundated with fans hoping to score a box of cigarette rolling papers featuring the hip-hop artist’s face emblazoned on the materials.

“It’s been a real drag, man,” said Ernie Niebstoch, proprietor of Santa Calcetines-based smoke shop Gage Against the Machine. “All these people are like accusing us of blowing smoke up their asses, but we don’t carry Wiz Khalifa papers. It’s a CD. Download it from Amazon or something. But they’re all ‘Give me the pape, bro, I got a big fatty to spark up.’ So, I started telling ‘em that the Zig-Zag guy on the skin was Wiz. You know, right? This one time, I told my girl that the Quaker Oatmeal dude was Barbara Bush, and she like totally fell for it. I’m not worried that anyone’s gonna get burned over it. Mostly, they forget what they came in for a few minutes later and ask for some Cheetos. Dude, this’ll all blow over tomorrow. I mean, this wouldn’t be a big deal if they advertised the record during Spongebob. So there’s some free advice for your PR biddies, Wiz. You’re welcome.”

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