BREAKING NEWS

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Netflix Gushes Over Amazon's Streaming Video Service in Letter to Shareholders

SAN NARCISO, Calif. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- In a letter to shareholders Wednesday, Netflix Inc. predicted that Amazon will brand its video streaming service as a competing standalone offering. The letter, published on Netflix's website, also said the company expects its rival to "continue to offer their video service as a free extra with Prime domestically but also to brand their video subscription offering as a standalone service at a price less than ours." Not only did Netflix executives describe Amazon's superior selection of titles and lower pricing, they also documented a series of unbelievable Amazon perks that included discounted company stocks for every three movies ordered, access to celebrity sex tapes before they get leaked to the Internet, a lifetime supply of popcorn, and free puppies. They added that Amazon Inc. "also sells a crapload of other really cool things."

In related news, Amazon stocks soared to record highs Wednesday and Netflix announced the resignation of its Marketing Chief.

(c) 2012. See disclaimers.

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