BREAKING NEWS

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Moody’s Downgrades Greece’s Credit Rating -- Greeks Appeal by Sending Exquisite Horse Statue as Gift

NEW YORK, N.Y. (Bennington Vale Evening Transcript) -- Jean-Claude Trichet, president of the European Central Bank, said the ECB would not be able to accept Greek bonds as collateral if Greece has its debt rated as default. Trichet added that “the governments would have to take care the Eurosystem is presented with collateral that it could accept.” However, after discovering that the latest bail out plan announced last week would require private sector debt holders to accept losses, Moody’s again downgraded the financially embattled country’s credit rating to one notch above default. Previously, Moody’s had ranked Greece as Caa1, which falls well within the category of junk bonds.

Officials from Greece expressed concerns over the Moody’s rating, especially because “all governments pay a subscription to these services. Perhaps the Finance Ministry should cancel its subscription. Maybe we could save some money that way.”

But in a eye-popping, last ditch appeal for Moody’s to reconsider its evaluation, Greek representatives delivered a stunning gift to the head offices of Moody’s Investor Services in New York.

“I don’t know how they did it,” exclaimed one employee standing outside the building, “but during the night, Greece delivered this beautiful 30-foot high wooden horse. The craftsmanship is exceptional, and it’s been drawing crowds all afternoon. We’re not sure what it does yet, but it’s certainly an overwhelming gesture.”

(c) 2011. All stories are works of satire and parody.

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